An interesting question came up a few days ago, should parents provide their kids with broad exposure to the world, or try to protect them from things that the parent sees as either ‘dangerous or immoral’? I come down pretty squarely on the side of broad exposure.
Our hometown, San Francisco, winds up on the news frequently, (or at least I hear from acquaintances from out of town that it does), for things like open drug use and homelessness. I wish our town did more to help the people who are victims of these two issues—by that, I mean of course, the people who are drug users and the homeless, not the frequently pearl-clutching newscasters.
I’ve seen both open drug use and homelessness in San Francisco. I’m not here to tell you that it doesn't happen. I am here to tell you that it’s not a lifestyle that anyone chooses. I am hear to tell you that the people experiencing it aren’t having a good time with it. I am also here to tell you that contrary to whatever myths the news chooses to portray, our town, whatever it’s budget, is not doing enough to help.
I’m also here to say that the 11, 9, and 7 year-old gang here have seen open drug use and homelessness, and while I wish these things weren’t happening, I’m very, very fine with the kids having seen it. In the example of drug addiction, they know what it can look like towards the end of the trail, and that it doesn’t look like fun. In terms of homelessness, I don’t think I’ll ever hear any of them comment on a person choosing to be homeless. Both of these things, I think, are good world views to have.
Did the kids pick up these views all on their own? Not entirely. We discuss what we see while we're out and about. We talk about how people can end up, through no fault of their own, in these situations. For example, lots of kids arrive in San Francisco because their parents kicked them out of their homes because of their sexual orientation or gender identity.
I believe the gang getting broad exposure to the world is a good thing because they can gain these perspectives without haveing to muse on hypotheticals. They've seen intravenous drug users sitting down next to a puddle of pee on the sidewalk to shoot up. They've seen people asleep in the cold, their feet, covered in sores, stickign out from under a too thin blanket. They'll know anyone that tells them someone 'chose' these things is full of shit.
Being in the world, experiencing the world is how we gain the experience that can help us try to change the world for the better.
One last thought. Lots of people seem to believe that homelessness, drug use, or mental illness will lead to violence against bypassers. This hasn’t been our experience. In years of being on foot and public transit all over the city, the kids and I have never had an issue. We’ve wandered by people that were yelling, but they weren’t yelling at us, or anyone else for that matter. And that’s been the worst of it for us, people yelling a few feet away. It wasn’t a matter for police. It should be a bigger matter for our government to provide more compassionate aid.
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