Kids, Independence, and Personal Discomfort

The kids just headed out in the 39 degree F weather, in the dark to walk the dog. It’s there thing. The do it every night. They have for years.

My dad watched them go. It’s killing him.

He tried to stop the whole thing.

It’s killing him.

I value their independence above just about anything else. I love watching them do things. Not the things I chose, but the things they picked for themselves. I’ll do what I can to keep them doing those things even if it means other folks might have to sit with their discomfort.Even—especially—when I have to sit with my own discomfort.

And, I wonder if that’s always it? Do people try to shut the kids down ala

“Do your parents know where you are?’

Or by charging a child balanced on a bike rack with exhortations of

“Are you al right?!”

Yeah, they sure were alright before somebody started anxiously coming at them.

I wonder, how much of ‘keeping kids safe’ is just about not being able to tolerate personal discomfort, and how much is actually about their safety?

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